power mish-nap

I usually take "power naps" after I get home from school and work. It usually lasts for an hour or two then I get up and do my assignments. I usually sleep at around 12 or 12:30 in the morning, getting four to five hours of sleep everyday. I work 38-plus hours per week in addition to seven to eight hours of school, not including time spent on assignments. This has been my routine since August when Fall semester started, and though I still struggle and it's been stressing me out big time to do full-time work and go to school part-time taking three to four subjects, I'm just glad I'm back in college. Hope I could have it the other way though, full-time school part-time work, pero hindi pala biro ang magpaaral ng sarili mo hehe. Plus bills, bills, bills.

Well, it's been a stagnant two years and it's time to move forward. Not even the recession in America could stop me.

Anyway, I was taking one of these power naps awhile ago so I got into bed by 7 p.m. and set my alarm for 8 o'clock. But as everyone knows, you always have that option to "snooze." However, I don't know which part of my brain-hand coordination doesn't get it but I usually end up pushing that button for completely shutting off the alarm.

Unknowingly, that's what I did just tonight like every other night (and morning as well).

I got up, got my cell phone, looked at the clock and saw that it was 10 before 9. However, when I woke up, I was in that mindset that it was time for me to go to work.

And I get up to go to work at 5 a.m. (leaving the house by 6:20-ish). Seeing that it's 9 o'clock on my phone, well, you could just imagine how I would have reacted.

I kind of panicked and kept on telling myself, "Damn, this is not happening today." I've never been totally late to work and I know how bad this is gonna look on my record.

But I guess it did not dawn on me that it was really dark outside, but hey in Arizona, with all the dust storms, it could be 12 in the afternoon and really dark. And since I sleep with all lights off, it's kind of hard to digest what time it really is (Plus the fact that I do not have wall clock in my room. Better put on things-to-buy list: Buy a wall clock).

Anyway, to make the long story short: I got up, I panicked, I hurried to go to the bathroom to take a shower but I decided to check out what time it really is and to see my father on the room kind of gave me a relief. Yep, it is 9 o'clock, in the evening.

After I got my mind and senses back on track, I turned my laptop on and worked on my reaction paper due for Thursday afternoon.

Kaya ang advice ko, get enough sleep. Now I understand how people who suffer from sleep depravation could end up getting hit by a car while crossing the street (What?).

At tulad ng sabi ni Bob Ong, matulog kayong mga bata pag hapon. Pag nagkatrabaho na kayo (o gaya ng sabi ng Ong, pag natuto kayong umibig), magsisisi kayo kung bakit mas pinili ninyong manood ng Power Rangers kaysa humilata sa kama ng hapong iyon.

joke for the night

I was watching yet another rerun of Everybody Loves Raymond, which is one of the best TV comedy shows ever, and Frank (Ray's dad) said this joke to Raymond that got me shaking my head for as long as I could.

Frank: Don't you know that Mark Twain had a son? Do you know what they called him?

Ray: (looks at Frank waiting for the answer)

Frank: They called him Choo Choo.

Choo Choo Twain!! Hahahaha.

*toinks*

Let's just hope I won't suffer from an LJK - Last Joke Syndrome.

i hope so

Old song. Same emotions. Same memories coming back to haunt you all over again. And every day you hope that it'll be the day you'll just finally snap out of it. "It'll all get better in time."

I hope so.

Try again tomorrow. *sigh*


Better In Time
Leona Lewis

It's been the longest winter without you
I didn't know where to turn to
See somehow I can't forget you
After all that we've been through

Going coming thought I heard a knock
Who's there no one
Thinking that I deserve it
Now I realise that I really didn't know
If you didn't notice you mean everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'm gon' be ok

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

I couldn't turn on the TV
Without something there to remind me
Was it all that easy
To just put aside your feelings

If I'm dreaming don't wanna laugh
Hurt my feelings but that's the path
I believe in
And I know that time will heal it
If you didn't notice boy you meant everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'm gon' be ok

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

Since there's no more you and me
It's time I let you go
So I can be free
And live my life how it should be
No matter how hard it is I'll be fine without you
Yes I will

spam

agosto 21, 2008

antagal-tagal kong nagtiis at naghintay na hindi basahin ang message mo sakin.

and it turned out, after months of anticipation, spam lang pala siya.

now i have proven, time will make you realize everything you have to even if you're not ready yet.

time forces you to heal and catches you at your weakest moment.

thank you, time. now i know.

our love was just a spam after all. it simply sat there. it was meant to be deleted.

just like what i did to your message.

(boohoo. hehe.)

- isa sa mga bagay na tina-type ko sa notepad kapag feel ko lang magjot-down ng short ideas for stories. minsan din may mga bagay sa buhay ko na pinaghuhugutan. bahala ka na mamili kung alin sa dalawa ang angkop para dito.

listen to adele

I heard this song when I watched SNL's episode featuring an appearance by Vice Presidential Nominee Sarah Palin.

Musical guest Adele looked cutesy on stage after every song she belted out in SNL. It was funny and just plain cute. She looked so serious when she sings but after it she seemed like this shy girl who just finished a talent portion in a school program.

Anyway, her song "Chasing Pavements" has a very exquisite, sophisticated, melancholy, drowning tone to it. It's like the kind of song you want to play while hanging out in a cafe late in the afternoon waiting for a "lover" or some sort.

Just a thought, I think at the end one should just give up instead of chasing pavements. Because the chase would always leave you nowhere. Definitely.

Just a thought.


Chasing Pavements
Adele

I've made up my mind
Don't need to think it over
If I'm wrong I am right
Don't need to look no further
This ain't lust, I know this is love but

If I tell the world
I'll never say enough
Cause it was not said to you
And that's exactly what I need to do
If I'm in love with you

Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere
Or would it be a waste?
Even If I knew my place should I leave it there?
Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

I'd build myself up
And fly around in circles
Waiting as my heart drops
And my back begins to tingle
Finally could this be it

Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere
Or would it be a waste?
Even If I knew my place should I leave it there?
Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere
Or would it be a waste?
Even If I knew my place should I leave it there?
Should I give up
Or should I just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

checklist: revisited

I had this post back in June 2006 where I had a checklist of the things I wanna do in my life. I saw the post again as I was reviewing the previous posts in this blog and thought maybe I should do an update on it. Surprisingly, I've got a lot of things to cross off on my checklist, which is kinda uplifting. I also revised some of my "provisions" since I've had a change of perspective about them. Plus some of them are kinda subjective and there is really no measurement of accomplishment. I'd rather stick to the tangible ones. I guess I should spend more of my free time accomplishing this checklist rather than "emo-ing." :p

Click here for the original checklist.

CHECKLIST

1. Build a dog pound so that all of the stray dogs in our neighborhood will be taken care of. (A promise I made when I was like seven. Yah, kinda childish. I just remembered about it while I was walking home and saw a dog without its owner. The human brain is a real wonder. The memory of it just suddenly hit me.)

2. Ride a rollercoaster (Yes, I haven't rode in one. The closest thing I could get was to a caterpillar ride back in my elementary days. Coz I get dizzy and might end up throwing up. Well, how would I know if I don't get to try it right?)

3. Be someone that my parents I myself is going to be proud of. There is no one else who could be more prouder of you than you.

4. Read all of the books that I bought or received from people (I'm starting on this one and have read three or four books while staying here in AZ. I have the time now so it's all good) Note to self: Make a list of books read in the past and will read in the future.

5. Ride on a cruise ship.

6. Have one wild ride on a hot air balloon. (Okay, drop the wild thing)

7. Be able to go to New York, Paris, Antartica, and Japan - Go to as many countries as possible, having these three on the top of the list.

8. Learn how to drive a car. YEY!

9. And in connection to number 8, buy my own car. (I'm thinking of either a Mustang or Convertible. And if only I have the money, maybe a Ferrari...and an armored van. Seriously. I love that "car"). I bought my own car two days before my 22nd birthday, a 2008 black Mazda 3. I still have five years to go to pay for it, but it's all worth it.

10. Be published in a book.

11. Live a dream job - in context, be a successful writer, vet (wow, I can't believe I actually mentioned this), or become one of the people behind the Oprah show. Yah, very rewarding. (There still more...just can't think of 'em right now)

12. Learn to speak in Spanish, Japanese, French, and maybe Latin (seems like my language classes in College)

13. Be inside an igloo and sleep there overnight (that's why I'd like to go to Antartica hehe)
14. Join in a Go-Kart Racing.

15. Treat my closest friends to a trip somewhere for a vacation (Coz the supreme being knows how much I love my true, closest friends. They're half my life)

16. Treat my closest cousins to a trip, too. (To reminisce the good old days we had and to catch up with each other)

17. Of course, treat my parents, my brother, and my Tita Ofel to a trip somewhere too (Or perhaps just anything that I know they would enjoy and make them happy. They're the other half of my life, and it took 20 years for me to realize and admit that)

18. Reward the people who were good to me, good to other people, and those who were never hypocrites. As well as punish those who are hypos. Yes, revenge is sweet.

19. Go to a concert of Fall Out Boy (and probably take a picture, or even meet them. I just love this band's music)

20. Help my cousin(s) to finish their studies.

21. Donate $240.00 to the Operation Smile Organization (Yes, it only takes $240.00 to give one child the smile that he or she deserves. That's like a week of my salary. I'm starting to set aside money for this, day by day. It doesn't hurt to give back. I hope you'll do too)

22. Go back to Elbi. (UP Los Banos) I have accomplished this in 2007, though I will never grow tires of going back to Elbi. It will always be my surreal home.

23. Attend my highschool reunion a different person, in a good way. Coz my highschool life is pretty much a big regret (except for the people I met during that time. Well, some of them)

24. Buy my own house with great interior deco. Or if I get richer, have a library, a ZEN garden, and a swimming pool/jacuzzi in it. But that's just if I get lucky. I've gotten tired of swimming pools/jacuzzis; hot tubs will do the job for me.

25. Have a boyfriend (Now this is complicated. Actually, I'm not sure if I actually "need" one, if there's gonna be. I'm selfish of my time. So I guess no guy's up for that. Just included it here in case I change my mind. Just for fun :p). I have decided that this does not deserve a place in the checklist. It seems childish to me now. :)

26. Have an Organ Donor card Technically, I haven't printed out my card yet but I have registered myself to be an organ donor. It's just weird though, coz I just realized I am now an organ donor here in Arizona plus I have an organ donor card in my wallet from the Philippines. Now there's a conflict right there.

27. "Balikan si Cham-Cham," an LTS-2 student who made it clear to me how children need the attention and education they deserve to realize their full potential. A kid who made me see how lucky I am to get the education my parents worked hard for. Coz it really does pay back.

28. Be at TRL while Lindsay Lohan is hosting or the guest there hahaha. Okay, we could remove the LL part. Just wanna know the feeling of being on the set of a TV show. Such a thrill.

29. Die young (hmmm...morbid) I am still looking forward to this one but I think it is too subjective and does not, again, deserve a place on the list.

30. Meet Genoveva Edroza Matute (Before it's too late. Or is it already?)

31. Buy a laptop/notebook My first ever investment of my hard-earned money before the car. Though my laptop's battery only last for an hour or so, and though I am still saving up to buy a new longer-lasting battery, I love my HP laptop. I'M A PC! Haha.

32. Organize my CDs, VCDs, and DVDs MP3 and video files in my laptop. I just realized I really don't have that much CDs/VCDs/DVDs so there is really nothing to organize. Let me rephrase it instead.

33. Buy my own iPod video Touch (haha, i wish) An iPod Touch 32 GB just costs $400 in Costco. Hmm... Let's see on Thanksgiving or Christmas.

34. Not be a spendthrift most of the time (Now, this is hard) Subjective!!!!!!!!!

35. Attend my closest friends' graduation by March of next year This has been long over and I was not able to attend. Some of them have very exclusive graduation ceremonies, while the UP Los Banos ceremony was held a month after I left the Philippines (had a three-month vacation in 2007).

36. Buy the DVD collections of my favorite tv series (I just love watching them over and over again). Waste of money.

37. Do a road trip with my brother

38. Do a "great" film with, or for FC

39. Create our own book launch with my LAYB peeps (Yes guys, our own book, because I believe in what we can do if we just have the time, the money, and our whole heart plunged into it. It's not that far from happening.)

40. Create my will and testament before I die (Well, actually I don't know if a Will and Testament really applies to me since I don't have any large assets to share with anybody, but there are some small yet valuable things for me that I want someone to have. It's my way of letting them know how much they meant to me. And at least before I die, I would finally speak up about what I really felt. It's like a hit-and-run thing. Whatever they'd say about it, I don't care anymore since well, I'm dead haha. And it's much better to die prepared hehe.)

41. Join the Peace Corps. NEW!

42. Do mass amounts of rewarding volunteer work. When I did volunteer work last May for a breast cancer walkathon, just out of curiosity and since I just wanted to do something different, it sparked an idea for me to be more involved in volunteering. I have been slacking off with this one lately due to school and work, but once I have time on my hands again, I'll get back on track. NEW!

43. Complete half of the things to do in the book, "101 Things to Do Before You Die." -> So I guess this kind of adds 51 more items on this checklist. ;)